I just spent a nostalgic week in my old Lexington, Kentucky, home. The highlight was, by far, grand baby time, but a few other things left me so aware of God's blessings in my life. About 21 days ago I took on the challenge to post pictures, for 100 days (#100happydays), of things that make me happy. Needless to say, I've been snapping pictures left and right, east and west, from California beaches to Kentucky hills. It has been a fun exercise and I guess that is the point - to make one happy with happy things! Here is the story of one such happy snapshot that made me literally recall a real life snapshot and why this picture is symbolic of a time when I was at a turning point of change; a time when I was at a crossroads and I could have gone either way. I am so happy I chose the right path.
My snapshot was of a highway sign in Kentucky on Route 68 - in front of an old building that houses a restaurant that is a regional favorite of many in the Lexington, KY, area. The restaurant is named Ramsey's and the spot on Route 68 right, in front of Ramsey's, is a spot that will forever live in infamy for me. History says that Route 68 travels through many battleground areas from the Civil War. It was hilly and treacherous terrain back then. One day in 1998 my life was in treacherous terrain as a spiritual, psychological and physical war was raging for the life of my marriage. I had gone to my church to consult with a pastor and ask for prayer. He had prayed that God would give me peace that passes understanding. As I headed home to talk about a possible divorce with my husband, I yearned for God's peace and leading. I cried out to Him to help me forgive the unforgivable. It was on that spot on Rt. 68, in front of Ramsey's Restaurant, in Lexington, KY, that God answered my prayer. He reminded me that He had forgiven me - He had forgiven the unforgivable - could I not do likewise?! He swept into my car like a peaceful river, washing away any bitterness and unforgiveness that remained. The war had been waged, He had fought the battle for me, and He won as I surrendered everything to Him. As I continued to drive home and speak to my husband that night, it was with renewed grace and forgiveness. God did the rest. That was 14 years into our, then, tumultuous marriage. Now we have been married almost 30 years and the years since then have been a pathway to joy and peace only because Jesus is in the center of it all.
Route 68 was indeed a crossroads for me. I chose the right path, God's road to forgiveness and healing. I never drive past that spot without remembering what God did that day and every day since then. His love won the battle. That really makes me happy! #Route68
Saturday, March 1, 2014
Saturday, February 22, 2014
The Evolution toward Fifty-Something
It's February and that means I've been blessed enough to reach another earthly birthday. I'm not twenty-something. I'm not thirty-something. I'm not forty-something. A few years ago I reached what I hope to be about the half-way mile marker, so when birthdays come these days, I am just very grateful to be "something" at all. So, if the truth be known, I am fifty-something in a couple of days. If I may, I'm going to unpack a little evolution of decades that portray my journey to this momentous place. Thanks in advance for your indulgence. Everything herein is referring to me and what I experienced in each decade. I am by no means degrading another age group, because I know things change and each person is different as individuals. That being said, there will be some things that some of recognize as general to our age groups. Jump on board for the journey. We're about to evolve!
In my twenties I remember being that person who was starry-eyed and bushy-tailed and excited to take on the adventure of life. I had graduated from college, married my sweetheart, moved to NYC and had our daughter - all by the end of the decade. It was an active decade, and if you asked me then, I would have told you I had the world by the horns and I was maneuvering my ride through life pretty well. I look back on it now and I can say, while it seemed fun and exciting at the time, I would have done so much so differently. While I'm a bit scatterbrained, I've also always known that I have a higher than average IQ. I don't say that pridefully, but I say it to accentuate that, back then, I was prideful about it. I thought I knew everything and I tried to play God with my own life. I made unwise choices and rarely ever consulted God. I claimed to know Him, but you would never really have known it, except for a "help-me" prayer every now and again when I was in a tight spot. I thought the world was grand; I thought my life was grand; I thought I had arrived. In all reality, I was a snotty-nosed immature know-it-all! Ugh...I wasn't very good at playing God, after all.
Then came my thirties. I tell everyone that I think a light bulb finally gets turned on in our thirties. I became aware that I had been quiet naive in the previous decade and that maybe I wasn't as smart as I had perceived myself to be. More maturity and a bit more wisdom had started to shed some light onto life for me. My daughter was young and God started drawing me back into relationship with Him. I knew I wanted that for both myself and my child. Instinctively, I just knew that it wasn't all about me anymore and that there was a Great Designer who had a better plan for my life and this precious little girl I was now responsible for. Great, I thought I would tell my husband and he would be on board, but he wanted nothing of the kind. He secretly wanted to jump ship and scoffed at the idea that we needed God to become a strong happy family. We grew further apart and my soul started longing for my old Kentucky home. I convinced him to move and we headed for the hills. The Bluegrass became our new home, but something was still missing. My heart took me on a search and I realized I had become really lousy at playing God in my own life and the lives of my family. I recommitted my life to the Lord Jesus Christ and invited Him to be the LORD of my life for the very first time. It was the turning point in my life in so many ways. My husband drug his feet for a long time, but in the later part of our thirties decade, my prayer life for him and our marriage had intensified and he invited Jesus Christ into his own heart. THAT was the real turning point for us. We were a hot mess and we had come to Jesus just as we were - with so much gunk and garbage. He invited us in and started cleaning up the trash. Wow, I was beginning to see where real wisdom comes from. It is not inherent, but is imparted from the LORD as He is sought. What a revelation - yet again! So we set out on a new journey - a journey of faith this time - and we buckled our seat belts because when God is in the driver's seat it is both wild and adventurous...never a dull moment.
In our forties, we thought we had finally settled down into some semblance of normal life. We owned our dream house, we had an active social life with friends and were heavily involved in church activities. We both had good jobs and were finally secure - well, for a while, at least. Then I got laid off and eventually my husband - who was a master salesman that won every sales contest imaginable and took us on many great company-paid vacations, started hitting a brick wall in his career efforts. What in the world was going on? We were strong in our walk with the LORD, and all of a sudden we were really struggling financially. It wasn't the first time. In our twenties we had made dumb financial mistakes, but now we should have been better stewards with our resources. Yet, the well was drying up. Towards the last part of the decade we realized that it was God's plan to take us out of corporate America and use us in full-time ministry. My husband became a pastor and we moved from Kentucky to Colorado. After a few years we moved from Colorado to Illinois. Yes, this ministry thing was indeed a journey that was driven by God. We learned that this journey often included bumps in the road and unexpected detours. At the age of 48, I was diagnosed with breast cancer. It was a faith journey, for sure, and my God proved faithful, once again. I am so thankful that He has kept me and that I am now 4 years cancer-free. He opened my eyes to priorities once again and gave me just a little bit more wisdom as I hung onto His grace and sought His truth. I began to learn that obedience is a blessing and the presence of God was what I needed more than breath. He gave me both.
That brings me to the present decade. We moved to California nearly a year ago and my husband is a pastor who loves his job of helping people see their need for freedom and recovery as they surrender their lives to Jesus. He loves to tell our story of grace, forgiveness and redemption wherever and whenever God allows him to do so. He is a modern day evangelist and his passion for the LORD and for our family is an amazing blessing. I am in awe of how God transforms willing broken vessels. An awareness of His presence is at the center of our lives and marriage and we hang on for dear life with every new adventure He takes us on. We became grandparents this past year with our first grandchild, a precious little boy. Now, that, is a definite life-changer! Just when I think I've arrived and that I've finally matured enough to really start understanding life, God throws in a grandchild and we become like little children ourselves - quiet giddy - as we become bonkers over this little one who brings an entirely new dimension of love into our lives.
We have started to have a few maintenance issues with these earthly tents. Our models were created over half a century ago, but we are trusting that God will continue to give us the fuel and the upgrades we need to keep them well-maintained and functional on the road of this journey on which He has us. The teeth and the knees could use definite upgrades; our mental hard drives could use a re-boot every now and then; covering up grey hairs has become all too frequent and expensive and our propensity to sing jingles from too many commercials aired on the news channel that plays at least 50% of the time in our house has caused us to pause and realize we are not spring chickens any longer. But with all the stuff that makes us realize we are in the second half of this ballgame, we are more excited than ever to know that we will finish strong in this game of life. I hope I have at least 3 or 4 more decades to blog about before it's all over. And I'm sure God has so much more to teach me for every decade of "something" with which He graces me. But that's up to Him. He is the driver and He, alone, can navigate the twists and turns of my journey. I'm thankful He allows me to be along for the ride and that my journey is ever evolving until I reach my heavenly destination. That's where I will dance and sing even more boldly to the LORD and you could be privy to a new "Evolution of Dance" if you're up there with me. I hope you are!
From Psalm 71 - NLT: O God, you have taught me from my earliest childhood, and I constantly tell others about the wonderful things you do. Now that I am old and gray, do not abandon me, O God. Let me proclaim your power to this new generation, your mighty miracles to all who come after me.
17
In my twenties I remember being that person who was starry-eyed and bushy-tailed and excited to take on the adventure of life. I had graduated from college, married my sweetheart, moved to NYC and had our daughter - all by the end of the decade. It was an active decade, and if you asked me then, I would have told you I had the world by the horns and I was maneuvering my ride through life pretty well. I look back on it now and I can say, while it seemed fun and exciting at the time, I would have done so much so differently. While I'm a bit scatterbrained, I've also always known that I have a higher than average IQ. I don't say that pridefully, but I say it to accentuate that, back then, I was prideful about it. I thought I knew everything and I tried to play God with my own life. I made unwise choices and rarely ever consulted God. I claimed to know Him, but you would never really have known it, except for a "help-me" prayer every now and again when I was in a tight spot. I thought the world was grand; I thought my life was grand; I thought I had arrived. In all reality, I was a snotty-nosed immature know-it-all! Ugh...I wasn't very good at playing God, after all.
Then came my thirties. I tell everyone that I think a light bulb finally gets turned on in our thirties. I became aware that I had been quiet naive in the previous decade and that maybe I wasn't as smart as I had perceived myself to be. More maturity and a bit more wisdom had started to shed some light onto life for me. My daughter was young and God started drawing me back into relationship with Him. I knew I wanted that for both myself and my child. Instinctively, I just knew that it wasn't all about me anymore and that there was a Great Designer who had a better plan for my life and this precious little girl I was now responsible for. Great, I thought I would tell my husband and he would be on board, but he wanted nothing of the kind. He secretly wanted to jump ship and scoffed at the idea that we needed God to become a strong happy family. We grew further apart and my soul started longing for my old Kentucky home. I convinced him to move and we headed for the hills. The Bluegrass became our new home, but something was still missing. My heart took me on a search and I realized I had become really lousy at playing God in my own life and the lives of my family. I recommitted my life to the Lord Jesus Christ and invited Him to be the LORD of my life for the very first time. It was the turning point in my life in so many ways. My husband drug his feet for a long time, but in the later part of our thirties decade, my prayer life for him and our marriage had intensified and he invited Jesus Christ into his own heart. THAT was the real turning point for us. We were a hot mess and we had come to Jesus just as we were - with so much gunk and garbage. He invited us in and started cleaning up the trash. Wow, I was beginning to see where real wisdom comes from. It is not inherent, but is imparted from the LORD as He is sought. What a revelation - yet again! So we set out on a new journey - a journey of faith this time - and we buckled our seat belts because when God is in the driver's seat it is both wild and adventurous...never a dull moment.
In our forties, we thought we had finally settled down into some semblance of normal life. We owned our dream house, we had an active social life with friends and were heavily involved in church activities. We both had good jobs and were finally secure - well, for a while, at least. Then I got laid off and eventually my husband - who was a master salesman that won every sales contest imaginable and took us on many great company-paid vacations, started hitting a brick wall in his career efforts. What in the world was going on? We were strong in our walk with the LORD, and all of a sudden we were really struggling financially. It wasn't the first time. In our twenties we had made dumb financial mistakes, but now we should have been better stewards with our resources. Yet, the well was drying up. Towards the last part of the decade we realized that it was God's plan to take us out of corporate America and use us in full-time ministry. My husband became a pastor and we moved from Kentucky to Colorado. After a few years we moved from Colorado to Illinois. Yes, this ministry thing was indeed a journey that was driven by God. We learned that this journey often included bumps in the road and unexpected detours. At the age of 48, I was diagnosed with breast cancer. It was a faith journey, for sure, and my God proved faithful, once again. I am so thankful that He has kept me and that I am now 4 years cancer-free. He opened my eyes to priorities once again and gave me just a little bit more wisdom as I hung onto His grace and sought His truth. I began to learn that obedience is a blessing and the presence of God was what I needed more than breath. He gave me both.
That brings me to the present decade. We moved to California nearly a year ago and my husband is a pastor who loves his job of helping people see their need for freedom and recovery as they surrender their lives to Jesus. He loves to tell our story of grace, forgiveness and redemption wherever and whenever God allows him to do so. He is a modern day evangelist and his passion for the LORD and for our family is an amazing blessing. I am in awe of how God transforms willing broken vessels. An awareness of His presence is at the center of our lives and marriage and we hang on for dear life with every new adventure He takes us on. We became grandparents this past year with our first grandchild, a precious little boy. Now, that, is a definite life-changer! Just when I think I've arrived and that I've finally matured enough to really start understanding life, God throws in a grandchild and we become like little children ourselves - quiet giddy - as we become bonkers over this little one who brings an entirely new dimension of love into our lives.
We have started to have a few maintenance issues with these earthly tents. Our models were created over half a century ago, but we are trusting that God will continue to give us the fuel and the upgrades we need to keep them well-maintained and functional on the road of this journey on which He has us. The teeth and the knees could use definite upgrades; our mental hard drives could use a re-boot every now and then; covering up grey hairs has become all too frequent and expensive and our propensity to sing jingles from too many commercials aired on the news channel that plays at least 50% of the time in our house has caused us to pause and realize we are not spring chickens any longer. But with all the stuff that makes us realize we are in the second half of this ballgame, we are more excited than ever to know that we will finish strong in this game of life. I hope I have at least 3 or 4 more decades to blog about before it's all over. And I'm sure God has so much more to teach me for every decade of "something" with which He graces me. But that's up to Him. He is the driver and He, alone, can navigate the twists and turns of my journey. I'm thankful He allows me to be along for the ride and that my journey is ever evolving until I reach my heavenly destination. That's where I will dance and sing even more boldly to the LORD and you could be privy to a new "Evolution of Dance" if you're up there with me. I hope you are!
From Psalm 71 - NLT: O God, you have taught me from my earliest childhood, and I constantly tell others about the wonderful things you do. Now that I am old and gray, do not abandon me, O God. Let me proclaim your power to this new generation, your mighty miracles to all who come after me.
17
Tuesday, January 21, 2014
Folding Fitted Sheets
I just tried to fold a fitted sheet. I have seen multitudes of examples of how it should be properly done, but do you think that has helped me perfect this elusive art? Absolutely not! I'm still a terrible fitted sheet folder. I need to be more studious and deliberate and patient about the method of getting it right, I suppose. Unfortunately my fitted sheets end up in a crumpled mess in the cupboard. I'm pretty sure Martha Stewart would not want to be my house guest at my current level of fitted sheet folding expertise.
Thinking about this ever-recurring flaw in my housekeeping skills as I take the fitted sheet out of the dryer, I start to compare it to my need to take the study of God's Word and be deliberate and repetitive about applying it to my life. My practice of doing so always helps me keep the nuggets of truth and wonders of God's grace neatly tucked into my heart and mind, ready to be unfolded when it's time to apply it. No matter how many times I may have read something or heard someone else teach about something in the bible, it is sort of useless to me unless I take it to heart, unless I put what I see and hear into action. I will end up a crumpled mess if I don't get that part right, or at least make a concentrated effort to put into practice that which I strive to know.
All that being said, I don't want to have to end up being that person that doesn't pay attention to God's best for me and my life. I don't want to disregard the multiple ways and times He shows me how I should do things. I don't want to end up in a crumpled mess instead of taking the time and effort to know how and why I should do things God's way - the right way. I want to study and learn; discern and apply. I want to be able to fold my virtual fitted sheet well so I don't end up in a mess.
But, right now, I'm back at the dryer and there is one immediate option that might work for me. I think putting the real fitted sheet on the bed, straight out of the dryer, warm and comfy, would be a perfect way to apply good wisdom right about now.
Thinking about this ever-recurring flaw in my housekeeping skills as I take the fitted sheet out of the dryer, I start to compare it to my need to take the study of God's Word and be deliberate and repetitive about applying it to my life. My practice of doing so always helps me keep the nuggets of truth and wonders of God's grace neatly tucked into my heart and mind, ready to be unfolded when it's time to apply it. No matter how many times I may have read something or heard someone else teach about something in the bible, it is sort of useless to me unless I take it to heart, unless I put what I see and hear into action. I will end up a crumpled mess if I don't get that part right, or at least make a concentrated effort to put into practice that which I strive to know.
All that being said, I don't want to have to end up being that person that doesn't pay attention to God's best for me and my life. I don't want to disregard the multiple ways and times He shows me how I should do things. I don't want to end up in a crumpled mess instead of taking the time and effort to know how and why I should do things God's way - the right way. I want to study and learn; discern and apply. I want to be able to fold my virtual fitted sheet well so I don't end up in a mess.
But, right now, I'm back at the dryer and there is one immediate option that might work for me. I think putting the real fitted sheet on the bed, straight out of the dryer, warm and comfy, would be a perfect way to apply good wisdom right about now.
Sunday, January 19, 2014
A Day of Celebration
Four years ago today I was scared. I had been sucker-punched with a breast cancer diagnosis the previous month and the time for my surgery had finally arrived. The follow-up doctor appointments sort of became a blur as I just tried to hang on to the fact that God loved me and my life was in His hands. I had peace in His love for me and His goodness, but I have to admit, I was scared. My surgery to remove the cancer was January 20th, 2010. I went into surgery not knowing what to expect, but expecting that God would take care of me - whatever the outcome.
My surgery was a success. The cancer was removed with clear margins and no lymph node invasion. God blessed me with great care and great love. My husband was a rock - still is! My family and friends were so loving and supportive. I was blown away by how much people really care. I was also given a new perspective. One you don't understand unless you experience it. I knew the despair of being a cancer patient. But I also was given a second chance. I knew the blessing of being given a life extension - if you will. One never knows how long they will be around in this lifetime, but when you have a potentially life-threatening illness and you are brought through it by God's grace, you value each moment you are given. And, for me, I recognized exactly where my help came from. My help comes from the Lord and He is my Healer.
If this experience did one thing for me, it caused me to be more bold in sharing my love for the Lord with others. I've learned to worship the Lord freely with gratitude. His praise is always in my heart and on my lips. I am never ashamed to tell others just who Jesus is and what He has done for me. I love to invite them to know Him and His love and peace for themselves. I was pretty outspoken before, but now I have a new purpose. This experience made me see that more clearly.
My purpose is to glorify Jesus; to point people to Him. I do that by keeping my eyes on Him; keeping my heart bowed low and keeping my hands lifted high. I am the worshipper in the room. I cannot imagine living any other way. Gratitude in my heart has been magnified. I remember the song that came to my heart when I entered this storm, "My soul magnifies the Lord for He has done great things for me!" He had already done great things for me by dying on a cross for my sins. He took my place. That was more than enough. He went even further to grace me with His healing touch. When you have experienced that, you just know it. You can disregard it or you can embrace it. I choose to fully embrace it.
So, today - January 20, 2014 - I celebrate what God did for me and I celebrate Him. Sometimes, I still get a little scared, but the Lord tells me in 2 Timothy 1:7 that He did not give me a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind. With that truth, I can give my fears over to Jesus and let Him comfort me with His grace and peace. My future is not nearly as scary when I place my fears about it into His hands. It's just another great thing He does for me. My soul continues to magnify the Lord - He has, indeed, done great things for me!
Do you know Him? No apologies for asking. I'm just trying to fulfill my purpose. It makes one do bold things. I hope you choose to do something bold. I hope you celebrate Him!
My surgery was a success. The cancer was removed with clear margins and no lymph node invasion. God blessed me with great care and great love. My husband was a rock - still is! My family and friends were so loving and supportive. I was blown away by how much people really care. I was also given a new perspective. One you don't understand unless you experience it. I knew the despair of being a cancer patient. But I also was given a second chance. I knew the blessing of being given a life extension - if you will. One never knows how long they will be around in this lifetime, but when you have a potentially life-threatening illness and you are brought through it by God's grace, you value each moment you are given. And, for me, I recognized exactly where my help came from. My help comes from the Lord and He is my Healer.
If this experience did one thing for me, it caused me to be more bold in sharing my love for the Lord with others. I've learned to worship the Lord freely with gratitude. His praise is always in my heart and on my lips. I am never ashamed to tell others just who Jesus is and what He has done for me. I love to invite them to know Him and His love and peace for themselves. I was pretty outspoken before, but now I have a new purpose. This experience made me see that more clearly.
My purpose is to glorify Jesus; to point people to Him. I do that by keeping my eyes on Him; keeping my heart bowed low and keeping my hands lifted high. I am the worshipper in the room. I cannot imagine living any other way. Gratitude in my heart has been magnified. I remember the song that came to my heart when I entered this storm, "My soul magnifies the Lord for He has done great things for me!" He had already done great things for me by dying on a cross for my sins. He took my place. That was more than enough. He went even further to grace me with His healing touch. When you have experienced that, you just know it. You can disregard it or you can embrace it. I choose to fully embrace it.
So, today - January 20, 2014 - I celebrate what God did for me and I celebrate Him. Sometimes, I still get a little scared, but the Lord tells me in 2 Timothy 1:7 that He did not give me a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind. With that truth, I can give my fears over to Jesus and let Him comfort me with His grace and peace. My future is not nearly as scary when I place my fears about it into His hands. It's just another great thing He does for me. My soul continues to magnify the Lord - He has, indeed, done great things for me!
Do you know Him? No apologies for asking. I'm just trying to fulfill my purpose. It makes one do bold things. I hope you choose to do something bold. I hope you celebrate Him!
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